Are you a Judas or a John?
In Sunday school this morning, a wise old preacher shared this visual.
As you can see the large circle has bands working inward. Each band representing a group of followers of Christ, gradually narrowing until you reach the very center.
And there, alone in the smallest band, we find John.
The disciple whom Jesus loved.
As I sat there, studying this simple chart, something began to stir in me.
I started thinking about some of the different personalities within the twelve disciples.
Each one handpicked by Christ.
Each one unique.
Each one flawed.
And yet, each one used by God.
And it made me wonder—what kind of disciple am I?
What kind are you?
Are you like Peter?
Quick to speak.
Quick to act.
Bold and passionate, yet sometimes clumsy with your words.
You love the Lord fiercely, but sometimes your zeal outpaces your wisdom.
You are loyal, brave even—the one disciple who stepped out of the boat to walk on water. But, you’ve also had moments of failure.
You’ve denied Him in your actions, perhaps not with your lips, but with your silence or your compromise.
Yet the Lord looks at you not for your stumbles, but for your heart.
He sees the shepherd beneath the failure. He restores you. He uses you to feed His sheep.
“Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee.” (John 21:17)
Or maybe you’re more like Andrew.
Quieter.
More content behind the scenes.
Maybe you’ll never preach to crowds or lead movements, but you bring people to Jesus one by one.
You are steady. Humble.
You see value in others and help them find their way to Christ. It was Andrew who brought Peter to the Lord.
Your reward may not be in spotlight, but it is eternal.
“He first findeth his own brother Simon… and he brought him to Jesus.” (John 1:41–42)
Perhaps you can relate to Matthew.
You came from a background of comfort or prestige.
A life that was polished, professional, maybe even respected in worldly circles.
But when Christ passed by and said “Follow me,” you left it all.
You traded the security of your table for the uncertainty of the open road with Jesus. The world thought you foolish, but you found the riches that never fade.
“And he left all, rose up, and followed him.” (Luke 5:28)
Or maybe you resonate with Simon the Zealot.
You have a past.
Maybe even one full of misguided passion.
You fought for the wrong cause or gave your life to things that did not matter.
But now, you have turned your zeal to the Lord.
You’ve channeled that fire into the Kingdom of God. You once were a rebel, but now you are a servant. Your past has not disqualified you—it has been redeemed.
“If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.“ (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Are you like Thomas?
Wrestling with doubt.
Struggling to believe what you cannot see.
Your faith is real, but it wavers.
You want to be near Jesus, but your fear and reason get in the way.
You’ve had to touch the nail prints before you believed.
And yet, Jesus is not angry with you. He meets you where you are. He speaks peace to your troubled heart.
“Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.” John 20:29
Or maybe as much as you hate it, you see parts of Judas in yourself.
None of us want to admit it.
But how often have we sold out our walk with God for the sake of comfort, pride, or self-preservation?
How often have we traded obedience for convenience?
Judas walked with Jesus.
He kissed the cheek of the Son of God—yet his heart was never surrendered.
He was close in proximity, but far in spirit.
Let us take heed.
“Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall.” (1 Corinthians 10:12)
But oh, may we all strive to be like John.
The disciple Jesus loved.
The one who leaned on Jesus’ breast at supper.
The one who stayed at the foot of the cross when the others fled.
The one to whom Jesus entrusted His own earthly mother.
The one who stood faithful—not perfect, but steadfast.
“Then saith he to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.” (John 19:27)
John was present.
John was loyal.
John endured.
We all fit somewhere in the circle of discipleship.
Some days we’re Peter.
Other days, we are Thomas.
Some seasons we may feel like Andrew, quietly helping others while unnoticed ourselves.
And some days, we’re closer to Judas than we’d care to admit.
But the goal is always the same.
To move inward.
To draw closer.
To be found faithful.
Christ does not require perfection.
But He does desire devotion.
So today, I ask—
Which disciple are you?
And more importantly—
Which one do you want to be?
May we walk closer.
May we lean in deeper.
And may we be found at the foot of the cross, loving Him until the very end.
Biblical Womanhood
